It’s January. It’s the second Tuesday of the month. In the SQL world, that means it’s a TSQL Tuesday! This month’s edition is hosted by newly minted SQL Server MVP Jen McCown ( blog | @JenniferMcCown ) and the chosen topic is, “What technical resolutions have you been pondering, and why?”
I typically do not make New Year’s resolutions. My logic is simple: why make resolutions only on January 1? I can make them year round. And so I do make resolutions throughout the year. Some hold better than others, just like New Year’s resolutions for most. Interestingly, this year I did make a resolution over my holiday break, which included January 1, so this is timely.
Without further ado, my resolution for 2011 is to find balance…and yes, this is a technical resolution.
I have a problem with balance. Not the kind that keeps me upright, but with things that I need and want to do in my life. The root cause of this balance, I believe, is my inability to do anything half way. When I was learning to play tennis, the guy who was trying to teach me to play would get frustrated because I tried to hit the ball as hard as I could every single time. He told me I needed to learn how to hit at 50%. I don’t “do” 50%. It’s all or none.
Thus, when I became involved in the SQL Community last year, I jumped in without looking and tried to do it all. I created a blog, I got to go on SQLCruise, I started going to my user group meetings, I went to the PASS Summit, I volunteered for two Virtual Chapters and I volunteered to help with our SQLSaturday. Oh, I still have a job, and a wonderful husband, and two kids, and a dog, and a house to look after, and relationships to maintain.
Needless to say, some things didn’t fare so well. I didn’t sleep enough. I didn’t exercise like I wanted and needed to, I didn’t stay in touch with my friends as much as I would have liked. I struggled. Part of me screams, “I want to do it all!” The other part wisely says, “Be patient.” My mother says, “The most important thing in your life is your husband. Then your kids.” She also tells me, “This time when your kids are young goes fast, try to enjoy it.” And she is right.
I had many discussions with myself over my vacation. That’s a funny image I know, but it’s true. I probably thought about it too much, but it really came down to this: How can I be part of the community and contribute at a level that makes me happy, without sacrificing time for my family or for myself? Other people must do it. Or maybe no one is doing it well but no one is talking about it. The conclusion I came to over break is: I have no idea how to find the perfect balance. But I will figure it out. That’s my goal for 2011: to find the balance between my personal life, which I love, and my techincal life, which I love. Family will always win out over anything else, but I know that I need time to do “my thing,” that which makes me happy. Balance.
